Speaking of Vengeful Ex’s On Valentines Day… Claude

To enjoy this blog best, please play the song below as you read.

Wow! Claude Julien rolling in here at 100 kilometers per hour like he’s Joel Otto of the Calgary Flames. Today it was announced that the hated Habs have fired Michel Therrien and replaced him with Claude Julien days after a 4-0 spanking to the Julien-less Bruins. Is this the WWE? Because this is the type of over dramatic plot that only Vince McMahon could create. And while I do believe that the old “can you hear me now” Verizon guy that is now starring in Sprint commercials is the biggest traitor of recent memory, Claude has to be right up there with Benedict Arnold and Robert Hanssen.

Now I’ll cut to the chase and list out my key points surrounding this news.

  1. Claudes crying. Clearly he didn’t like the way things ended with the front office. But who can blame him? Who hasn’t run to an ex girlfriend after a nasty breakup? The Canadiens represent familiarity and normalcy in what has been a crazy week for the man. He gets to go back to a place he once lived and work for his old bosses. Not to mention he has now inherited Carey Price and Shea Weber to run his defense first system (not too bad). Unfortuantely for you Claude, everyone knows rebounding with an ex results in a VD and unresolved conflict. So enjoy peeing in a cup at the Montreal clinic, Claude.
  2. The Bruins don’t give a fuck. I love it. It was reported that the Canadiens asked for permission from the Bruins to talk to Claude on Sunday and they said go for it. As Sean Avery would say, enjoy our sloppy seconds. Because Claude still had time left on his contract, the Bruins could have easily said kick rocks to the Habs. Instead, they had no fear of Claude coaching the Bruins hated rivals, but why?
  3. Well, to keep this short and sweet, Claudes style of coaching is no longer relevant or effective in this NHL. Like I’ve said, I have nothing but love for the guy, but clearly a slow paced game will result in you teetering closer to a lottery pick rather than a Stanley Cup. So why would the Bruins not allow a divisional opponent that they are fighting for a playoff spot with to inherit his dinosaur era style of play. The Habs lack leadership (thats what happens when your captains a rich kid from Connecticut who looks like he spiked the punch bowl at a couple of winter formals in his prep school days), and firing a coach like this will only separate the locker room even more. I am now predicting a Habs downfall for the remainder of the season.
  4. GIVE ME A BRUINS V CANADIENS FIRST ROUND MATCHUP.

So grab a couple of Molsons, Montreal, and wash that taste of Bruins leftovers out of your mouth. And realize that while Claudes behind your bench, he’ll be thinking of the Black and Gold beauty that left him for Badboy Bruce.

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(sorry for all the sex/relationship analogies in these first two posts, I promise I’m not always this emotional)

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