Which NHL Player Would You Want To Light Up? Your Results Are Here!

So yesterday I was casually going through reddit where I found this post


And what an absolute perfect question to ask. We, and by we I mean normal people, will never make the NHL. It sucks, but it is what it is. But you know what? We can totally think that we are. As a hockey fan, everyone has at least 3 players that you literally hate. Not the “Oh i hate this or that” type thing but literal substancial hate. What do you want to do to people you hate? Buckle them at center ice, that’s what you want. So after I read this question, it was easy for me to make my selections. The rat boy Chris Kunitz, the turtleneck wearer Tomas Plekanec, and the red headed donkey Marc Staal. All three of these players infuriate me for one reason or another. Kunitz fan boys don’t realize that he’ll be one of the/ if not the only player in the NHL to win 4 cups and not make the hall. Plekanec is a joke of a hockey player who is notorious for diving and being softer than baby shit. Lastly, Marc Staal… Mark, oh Mark- I once tried writing a blog about this guy. The end result, after an hour and a half? “FUCK THIS GUY” repeatedly for around 20 pages. I live to hate Marc Staal. Anyways, after thinking about my list, I wanted to hear yours.

And boy oh boy, did this blow up. 424 different votes, 5,920 impressions and 1,682 total engagements. So what did I do? I tallied up the votes, naturally, and decided to write a blog about your top 3 players you’d love to yardsale.

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Brad Marchand


The nose face killa takes the number one spot. Although Brad has become a complete player 40 goal scorer, he cannot get away from the reputation of being a scumbag. I mean, last year he had the best year of his career and with a couple games remaining, spears a guy in the ball bag and gets suspended. And honestly.. I kind of respect it. Do your thing Brad. You are what you are and this guy doesn’t pretend that hes anything but a scummer. The people that voted for Brad- If you had the opportunity to have Marchand on your team, would you take him? If you say no then you’re an idiot and clearly don’t know how to win. Here is the Brad Marchand Lady Byng highlight reel:


Ryan Kesler


Sitting at the number 2 spot is Americas own Ryan Kesler. I can definitely see why you guys want to take him out. Annoying, in your face, chippy, cheap are all words or phrases to call this guy. He’s never won a cup and constantly pisses people off at all times. Here is Kesler vs. Jo-Jo in the playoffs.

I mean, maybe you can say he plays until the whistle?

This could go on and on. There are so many videos of Kesler on YouTube that shows his real colors and if you need to see that just type it in. Anyways, here’s a clip of Max Domi juggling Keslers Brain for those who want to see Ryan boy with his head down.


Sidney Crosby


Being the best player in the world automatically puts a target on your back. Now add the fact that you dive, bitch, whine and complain regularly and I get why people hate you. Sid the kid has gotten way better over the last couple of years in this respect, but it used to be unbearable.

As years went on I was starting to think he grew up. He’s won everything you could possibly win, made more money than pretty much anybody (other than McDavid) so you think the maturity level would rise. Nope. Wrong. Incorrect. Just check out what he did this year:

See you later, Finger.

Real classy move right here. “Crosby didn’t mean to..”, shut up. This is a precise attack on Ryan O’Reillys package. Facts. I’d kill someone for less.

So these were your three players and I respect your input. You all know how to pick annoying and agitating punks. Like I said with Marchand though, even though you hate them all three of these players would make whatever team you’re rooting for better.

Be sure to tune in to this weeks podcast where will definitely go over these results a bit more in depth. And remember, keep on hating.

Author: Ked

1st line thoughts with a 4th line heart. Hope you guys enjoy the site and let us know what we can do to make it better. ALWAYS remember-- When in doubt, glass and out.

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